Every year I make a big thing of my birthday. I use the opportunity to see all my friends and to throw them all together at a function that is all about me. And I love it! I always have.

Birthdays are also about change. Each birthday heralds the start of my own new year. Numerologists will tell you how the number of the year you are in, which influences your challenges and experiences, clicks over one notch on your birthday. I feel that notch click over and sometimes that feeling is a little uncomfortable. This year is no different. I feel like I am standing on the edge of a cliff and only have to throw myself off to realise my dreams. So I see my dreams and that makes me excited but there is also a cliff that I have to throw myself off of first. Shit.

So I have decided to take my birthday week off (yes, I always celebrate a birthday week). Well, pretty much. I think the experts would say I’m frozen in fear. Or they would tell me I’m procrastinating but, you see, I am always way to hard on myself so I’ve decided that this is a perfectly good thing to do when there is chaos: sit in the midst of the chaos and be still. Oh, and then throw a party. It has been a very emotional space so, to be honest, working would be difficult given the frequent breakdowns. Okay, I maybe exaggerate a little…but only a little.

I know I will jump. I just want to turn 35 first! Happy birthday to me.

We all do it. We convince ourselves that what we have is fine and so there is no reason to pursue anything else, even though we dream of something else. We keep those dreams locked away in the confines of our imagination and sell ourselves the comforting thought of mediocrity. Mediocrity keeps us safe and allows us the pleasure of not having to strive for anything nor to stand out in the crowd.

How many of you have filled a romantic void with someone who is “sweet and lovable but definitely not for the long term”? Do you relate to going to movies with friends who you didn’t really want to see because the other option was to stay at home alone? Perhaps you play a sport you don’t really enjoy because the team needs you? (continue reading…)

There is a lot of literature out there promoting a journey “back to spirit” and getting “back to soul”. The irony of this journey is that this isn’t a journey at all. Spirit or soul is the very essence of who we are. We are of it and we are it. Soul is right here and just is.

So what is the meaning of life then? Soul has chosen a physical experience. It has created all that is in order to experience it or, more accurately, in order for it to experience itself. Let me explain. In the beginning there had to be something because nothing can be created from nothing, right? I think all belief systems agree there. This something was all that existed so it could not experience itself because it had nothing to experience itself with. So, in order to see its reflection it needed to create a mirror. I believe this still ties in with science, quantum physics and most religion. (continue reading…)