Just like it has never been seen as endearing to be foolish, love has grown to be disliked too.

“The greatest thing you’ll ever learn is to love and be loved in return”, says the artist, Henri Toulouse-Lautrec, in the beautiful film about love, Moulin Rouge. The strange thing is that it is not something that needs to be learnt as we are all borne of unconditional love. It is something within us that needs to be rediscovered.

Love is the true experience of life. It is the one emotion that incorporates all that we are and wish to be. It takes us places we would not have otherwise gone; it makes us do things that we would have not attempted otherwise; it makes us foolish. Like all experiences in life, love has its ups and downs and the greater the ups, often the greater the downs. The key is to enjoy the downs as much as the ups. Often the downs can be characterised by bitterness and hate but there is still nothing but love.

What defines a fool? They have a poor reputation; one given to them by those who do not take risks because they claim they are too clever to make mistakes. A fool is innocent, pure and trusting. They rely on their inner knowing to guide them. Even though their ego may see an abyss ahead of them, they keep going. They stroll off the edge with the faith and knowing that has typified many of the great leaders and warriors of history. Think of the great explorers who set out to prove to people that the world does not end and you cannot sail off the edge. How similar is love? Every experience of love is different yet we choose to see it as the same and this is what makes it the same. This is what results in repeated patterns in love. The patterns provide our ego with comfort but rob our soul of experiencing.

To be a fool in love it is necessary to abandon the mind. Laugh at the mind and its antics as it tries to anticipate what will happen next and how the other will react to your words and actions. Go with what you want to do and say. If you find yourself stopping yourself then you know that the innocence is being disturbed.

I recently experienced unrequited love. This is something that is written about a lot. It is an uncomfortable space but one that needs to be seen for what it is – love with yourself. Hindsight can make you look stupid because your actions were never reciprocated. Yet, the gift you give yourself is to see how you can abandon all rules and norms and be yourself regardless of how it may seem. Have you tried to “dance like no one is watching”? We have all heard the saying but for some of us it is more difficult than it may sound. It requires you to listen to what you hear in the music and to respond how you want to respond, not how you have been taught to respond, which fits in with the rest of the crowd. If you are one of those who criticises others for how they dance you will find this even more difficult. Try it though because when you have mastered this you are starting to get the concept of being foolish in love.

Then take another step and do it again…differently.